英文短笑话-英文短笑话(含翻译)

英语的小短笑话

关于英语的小短笑话 　　人类历史上，人自从有了语言，就已经出现了开玩笑的语言，我收集了关于英语的小短笑话，欢迎阅读。

　　关于英语的小短笑话【一】 　　One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. The city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree. The city man said to the farmer,"
I see that your pig likes apples, but isn"
t that quite a waste of time?"
The farmer replied,"
What"
s time to a pig?"
　　关于英语的.小短笑话【二】 　　a kiss At a dinner party, the speaker, who was the guest of honor, was about to deliver a speech when his wife sitting at the other end of the table, sent him a piece of paper with the word "
KISS"
scribbled on it. The guest seated next to the speaker said, "
Your wife must love you very much, I see her send you a '
KISS'
before you begin your speech."
The speaker smiled and explained, "
You don'
t know my wife. The '
KISS'
she give me stands for '
Keep It Short, Stupid.'
"
　　关于英语的小短笑话【三】 　　A man wrote a letter to a small hotel he planned to visit on his vacation: "
I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?"
　　An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who said, "
I'
ve been operating this hotel for many years. In all that time, I'
ve never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or pictures off the walls. I'
ve never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly. And I'
ve never had a dog run out on a hotel bill. Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel. And, if your dog will vouch for you, you'
re welcome to stay here, too."
　　关于英语的小短笑话【四】 　　The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party.Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment,he said,"
Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow.When the door open,push with your foot."
　　"
Why use my elbow and foot?"
　　"
Well,gosh,"
was the reply,"
You'
re not coming empty-hangded,are you? 　　关于英语的小短笑话【五】 　　A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW. 　　"
Officer, look what they'
ve done to my Beeeemer!!!"
, he whined. 　　"
You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!!!"
retorted the officer, "
You'
re so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn'
t even notice that your left arm was ripped off!!!"
;
。

英语短笑话大全

　　冷笑话不同于一般的笑话，以其独特的制笑机制，能瞬间制造出一种特殊氛围。

我精心收集了英语短笑话，供大家欣赏学习! 　　英语短笑话篇1 　　Little boy: Daddy, I want to get married. 　　小男孩：爸爸，我想结婚。

　　Father jokingly said: Oh! Who did you have in mind? 　　爸爸打趣地问道：噢!谁是你心中合适的人选? 　　Little boy: Grandma. 　　小男孩：奶奶。

　　Father: Wait a minute, you did not think I'
d let you marry my mother, did you? 　　爸爸：等一下，你认为我会让你娶我的妈妈? 　　Little boy: Why not? You married mine. 　　小男孩：为什么不?你娶了我的妈妈。

　　英语短笑话篇2 　　As a band instructor at an elementary school, I require my students to turn in practice sheets signed by their parents so I can be sure they are putting in enough time. 　　作为一个小学的乐队指挥，为了确保学生投入足够的时间练习，我要求他们上交由他们父母签字的练习单。

　　I had to laugh, however, when one parent wrote on her child'
s sheet, "
Practiced 17 minutes, but it seemed like hours. 　　可是有一次，一位家长的签字把我逗乐了。

练习单上写着：“
练习了17分钟，但犹如几个时辰。

”
　　英语短笑话篇3 　　A dog owner claimed that his pet, when given money, would go to the news stall to buy a paper. his friend insisted on a demonstration and handed the dog some money - the dog trotted off, but an hour later he had still not returned with the paper. 　　一位养狗人宣称：要是给了爱犬钱，它便会到卖报亭买份报纸来。

他的朋友坚持要来个演示，并给了狗一些钱。

狗一溜小跑着去了。

但一个小时过去了，仍不见它带报纸回来。

　　"
how much did you give him?"
asked the owner. 　　一位养狗人宣称：要是给了爱犬钱，它便会到卖报亭买份报纸来。

他的朋友坚持要来个演示，并给了狗一些钱。

狗一溜小跑着去了。

但一个小时过去了，仍不见它带报纸回来。

　　"
five dollars. 　　“
五元。

”
　　"
well, that explains it. when you give him five dollars, he goes to a movie. 　　"
这就是了。

你给它五元钱时，它就去看电影。

　　英语短笑话篇4 　　Gravely ill, a man went to the doctor with his wife. After the examination the physician motioned for the wife to meet him in the hallway. 　　一个人得了重病，妻子伴随他去看医生。

检查过后，医生示意病人的妻子到走廊见他。

　　"
Your husband is very sick, "
the doctor said, "
but there are three things you can do to ensure his survival. First, fix him three healthful, delicious meals a day. Next, give him a stress-free environment , and don'
t complain about anything. Finally, make passionate love to him every day.“
　　你丈夫病得很重，”
医生说，“
但有三件事可保住他的性命。

第一，一日三餐，要营养美味。

第二，给他一个轻松的环境，不要抱怨。

第三，每天都对他倾注炽热的爱。

”
　　On the drive home the husband asked, "
What did the doctor say?"
　　在驱车回家的路上，丈夫问道：“
医生说了什么?”
　　"
I'
m sorry, "
she said, "
but you'
re not going to make it.“
　　很遗憾，“
你活不成了。

”
。

英语笑话带翻译简短的

　　阿凡提是一个众所周知的民间机智人物,其笑话 故事 精练深刻,内容丰富,讽刺性和幽默感强。

下面我整理了 英语笑话 带翻译简短的，希望大家喜欢! 　　英语笑话带翻译简短的品析 　　急诊 Help! Doctor 　　"
Help! Doctor! Please come quickly! My ten-year-old son has just swallowed a pen!"
　　"
Ok, I'
ll be right there. I'
ll be there in 10 to 20 minutes."
　　"
Good, but...what am I supposed to do in the meantime?"
　　"
Just use another pen!"
　　“医生，救命!请您快点儿到，我十岁的儿子刚刚吞掉了一支钢笔!” 　　“好，我十几分钟就到，” 　　“好的，那…
…
这十几分钟我应该做什么呢?” 　　“换支笔用!” 　　经典英语笑话带翻译简短的 　　我教老师 I Taught the Teacher 　　Mother asked her little boy:"
Darling, what did the teacher teach you today?"
　　"
Nothing, Mum, answered the son proundly, instead, she asked me how much one plus two was, and I told her three."
　　母亲问她年幼的儿子：“宝贝，今天老师教了你些什么?” 　　“儿子骄傲地说：什么都没教，妈妈。

她反倒问我一加二等于几，我告诉她等于三。

” 　　关于英语笑话带翻译简短的 　　一切都很正常 　　Things Have Been Okay 　　一切都正常 　　A young couple were becoming anxious about their four-year-old son, who had not yet talked. 　　一对年轻夫妇有个儿子，已经四岁了，还没有开口说话，他们对此深感焦虑。

　　They took him to specialists, but the doctors found nothing wrong with him. 　　他们带他去找专家诊治，但医生们总觉得他没有毛病。

　　Then one morning at breakfast the boy suddenly blurted, Mom, the toast is burned. 　　后来有一天早上吃早餐时，那孩子突然开口了：妈妈，面包烤焦了。

　　You talked! You talked! Shouted his mother. 　　你说话了!你说话了!他母亲叫了起来。

　　I'
m so happy! But why has it taked this long? 　　我太高兴了!但为什么花了这么长的时间呢? 　　Well, up till now, Said the boy, things have been okay. 　　哦，在这之前，那男孩说，一切都很正常。

　　英语笑话带翻译简短的欣赏 　　勒索圣诞树 An Axe to Grind 　　A boy begs his father to get him a Christmas tree this year. 　　一个孩子求他爸爸，说能不能今年为家里准备一棵圣诞树 　　Each year, the boy asks and the father tells him, "
I don'
t want to pay for it."
　　小男孩每年求他爸爸得到的都是同样的回答“我可不想为一棵树付钱。

”(这个爸爸肯定不是徒，而且还非常抠门) 　　But the son kept begging. Unable to bear his son'
s whining, he picks up his axe one day andheads out of the house. 　　但是小男孩不放弃的一直祈求，终于有一天，他爸被他的哀求折磨得受不了，他拿起一把斧子，直接冲出了门。

　　Thirty minutes later he returns with a great big Christmas tree. "
How did you cut it down sofast?"
his son asks. 　　30分钟后，他爸爸带着一棵超大的圣诞树回到了加。

他儿子问：“你怎么会砍得那么快?” 　　"
I didn'
t cut it down,"
the father replies. 　　他爸爸回答到：“我不是砍的” 　　"
I got it at a tree lot."
　　“我是从一个圣诞树销售中心拿的” 　　"
Then why did you bring an axe?"
　　“那你为什么还要带把斧子去呢?” 　　"
Because I didn'
t want to pay."
　　“因为我不想付钱” 　　英语笑话带翻译简短的品味 　　谁在打架? Who was fighting? 　　Who was fighting? 　　谁在打架? 　　Mother: Freddie, why is your face so red? 　　Freddie: I was running up the street to stop a fight. 　　Mother: That'
s a very nice thing to do. Who was fighting? 　　Freddie: Me and Jackie Smith. 　　妈妈：弗雷迪，你的脸为什么那么红? 　　弗雷迪：我刚才在大街上跑，为的是阻止一次打架。

　　妈妈：你做的对，谁和谁在打架。

　　雷迪：我和杰克·
史密斯。

英语笑话带翻译简短的

　　笑话是幽默的一个属概念 ,具有幽默的一切特征。

笑话是民族特有幽默的一种形式。

我整理了简短的英语笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读! 　　简短的英语笑话带翻译篇一 　　When they’
re together, my five-year-old son and his cousin tend to cause mayhem. one Saturday, I put my foot down. “
All right, you two,”
I said sternly. “
No screaming , grabbing, whining, hitting, teasing, tattling, breaking toys, scratching or fighting.”
　　As I turned to leave, I heard my son say, “
C’
mon, Steven, let’
s get dirty . ”
　　我五岁的儿子和他的表弟在一起的时候，总要招来大乱。

一个星期六，我开始抗议了。

“
好啦，你们两个，”
我严厉地说，“
不许叫喊，不许乱拿，不许哭闹，不许乱敲，不许取笑，不许扯淡，不许弄坏玩具，不许乱抓，不许打架。

”
我刚转身要走，就听我儿子说：“
来，斯蒂文，我们来把自己弄脏吧。

”
　　简短的英语笑话带翻译篇二 　　It’
s Good to Admit a Fault 　　John is not a “
good”
student. He always sleeps in the class. Today he sleeps again. 　　“
John!”
Teacher says angrily. 　　“
What? What’
s wrong?”
John is awaken. 　　“
Why do you make a face? It’
s classroom. Look! Everyone is laughing.”
Teacher says. 　　“
No one is laughing.”
The others murmured. 　　“
No, it’
s not me. I was not making a face. I was sleeping.”
John fells upset. 　　“
Um. Not bad. You can admit your fault. You are still a good boy.”
Teacher is satisfied with it. 　　认错 　　约翰并不是个“
好”
学生。

他总是在上课的时候睡觉。

今天他又睡着了。

　　“
约翰!”
老师生气地喊他。

　　“
什么?出什么事了?”
约翰醒了。

　　“
你为什么要做鬼脸?这是教室!看看!同学们都在笑!”
老师生气地说。

　　“
没有人在笑呀。

”
其他同学笑声地嘀咕。

　　“
不，不是我。

我没有做鬼脸。

刚才我睡着了。

”
约翰感到不安。

　　“
嗯，还不错。

你承认自己的错误，还是给好孩子”
老师为此感到满意。

　　简短的英语笑话带翻译篇三 　　Mark is a good boy,but he is not very clean.His face and hands always very dirty. 　　One day,Mark goes to school.His teacher looks at him and says:"
Mark,I know what you eat today."
"
What?"
Mark asks. "
Eggs.your face and your mouth tell me that."
　　"
No."
Mark says,"
not today,but the day before yesterday."
　　翻译：马克是个好男孩，但他不是很干净。

他的手和脸总是很脏。

　　一天，马克去学校。

他的老师看着他，说：“
我知道你今天早上吃了什么。

”
“
什么?”
马克问道。

“
鸡蛋。

你的脸和嘴告诉了我。

”
“
不，”
马克说，“
不是今天，是前天。

”
。